Episode 3: Finding Yourself Again When You Feel Lost

Here are some actual phrases that women have said to me this month that might sound familiar to you too: “I kinda feel like I’ve lost myself!” or I want to start “feeling like a main character again” or I want to stop “hiding in my relationships.”

Do you see a common thread in those words like I do? These women want to feel like themselves again. They want to feel like they know who they are and like they can show up in their own lives and not feel like they are disappearing or lost. But sometimes they worry that they will ruin their relationships if they prioritize themselves in any way.

But the great news is that research shows that knowing who you are and feeling like you can be yourself is crucial to having good relationships. In this episode, we talk about why you might feel a little lost, why that can be a problem, and small ways you can start to feel like yourself again.

A Sneak Peek of What You’ll Find in This Episode:

Signs That You Might Have Lost Yourself

You find yourself with time to yourself and you aren’t sure what to do with it

You don’t love making decisions, even if it’s just what you want for dinner, and often answer with “I don’t care” or “whatever you want”

You can’t remember the last time you did something just because it made you happy — not because it was productive or for someone else

You don’t really have any hobbies or your own anymore

You have a long to do list, but nothing on it makes you excited to get out of bed in the morning

What You Can Do to Find Yourself

First, remember that small changes add up to a lot. You don’t have to move from where you are now to totally knowing yourself and feeling fully integrated into your relationships.

So taking small steps today can make a big difference! Do one thing that feels like yourself today. And then another tiny one tomorrow and it will all start to add up to a lot over time.

Activity Idea: One of the things that I’ve done when I felt lost and that I have participants of my 30-Day Challenge do to help them Rediscover themselves is to make a word cloud of words that describe you. Write your name on a paper and then surround it with words you know about yourself. Simple but powerful.

Additional Resources to Help Find Yourself When You Feel Lost:

Remember that small steps matter. I’ve set up a 30-Day Challenge that will help you do this is small and doable ways over one month
Read about How to Stop Feeling Like You’re Losing Yourself in Motherhood
A letter to The Woman Who Can’t Remember the Last Time She Had an Hour to Herself
My example of losing myself in friendship that I referenced in the episode: The Slow Boil of Bad Boundaries

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